Monday, May 10, 2010

Bienvenue aux Cannes!


Greetings Cyberspace,

I know you have heard it before. You probably have a laundry list of your own. Yours could even trump mine. Nonetheless, I will begin this post with the ritual anecdote regarding airline travel...

Ok so maybe its the fact that Sewanee does not put cable in our rooms, and the little television I do watch is hulu videos of "Saturday Night Live" episodes. Bottom line: I had no idea a volcano erupted. The first I heard about any volcano, I was watching SNL and Seth Myers was doing a segment on "Weekend Update" about the volcano. Well, the volcano is located on Mt. Eyjafjallajokull in Iceland. 1) Mt. Eyjlafkajsbiabieub?? Really? Sounds like someone got lazy and was like, "let me type every single letter I can and make it a word." Mary Poppins can't even sing this one. And Iceland of all places? Iceland is not a real country. They are so not allowed to pull this. International screw-ups are reserved for a select list of people: us (obviously...high-five W!), Japan (contain your SARS. Lock it up.), Britney Spears (her vagina has more hits on google than coverage of the Iraq war.), the Germans (they are always screwing stuff up--hello? Nazis.), and of course, Sarah Palin (I read your book; the only thing that should be in an Alaskan's dinner plate, next to the mashed potatoes, is you.)

So the volcano put me back a few hours. No biggie. I enjoyed running through the Charles de Gaulle airport with my 4 suitcases (I had an hour to pack, but its me so what do you expect?). Good news: my suitcases are matching. Bad news: they're matching. There I am running like a member of the Kenyan olympic track and field team across the sea of French people, and I hear "Jordan Overstreet. AirFrance is paging, Jordan Overstreet. Final boarding call." Fabulous. I finally make it to the gate and get on the plane, only to find that yes, I was the only American, and yes, I have forgotten all--if any--of the French I learned senior of high school. Sorry, Mademoiselle Eubanks, we all can't be Catherine Denevue. Ok so I land in the Nice airport an of course, I look like death just warmed over so I had to put my face on. I get out of the bathroom to find that there are no bags left on the baggage claim carousel. Not even missing a beat, an AirFrance rep saunters over and drops the bomb that my luggage is on the plane behind me. Fabulous, I will just wear this ensemble (including the spanex) for 6 weeks. Well Madame AirFrance encourages me to wait for them, and seeing as the plane is only an hour and half away, I agree. She points me in the direction of the bar. She knew me too well. 4 glasses of red wine later, I finally get my bags and hop in a cab to my apartment. We are actually staying in Juan-les-Pins, which is like the Winchester of the South of France. Everything closes at 7 and the Wiffenpoofs chains are everywhere! But its cute and the apartment is close to the beach so all is forgiven.

I get this text from Betsy this morning: "Are you making friends? Did you lose them yet? I am worried about you." Hold the phone, Bets Bets, who do you take me for? The mousey quiet girl in the corner? I think I will be fine. That being said, I made friends!! Whooo hoooo. Frampton and Kyndall, I found a trifecta for Cannes. You haven't been replaced, just reproduced. The people in my corner of judgement at Blake and Katie. I mean Blake said "Robert Osbourne." I said "Turner Classic Movies." He said "I love Katherine Hepburn. I said "Bette Davis is my bitch." He said "fine, Eve Harrington, you can have her; Kate's mine." After that exchange, friendship is inevitable. You can find us at the Carlton, its going down. We will be those people having breakfast with Cate Blanchett. Be jealous! As for the program itself, Cannes is going to be so fun!! We had orientation today and got the 411. There are so many films going to be screened. James Franco is going to give a lecture on his new film in the American tent. Susan Sarandon is here because her new movie, "Wallstreet 2: Money Never Sleeps" is premiering out of competition. Not to mention all of my favorite directors--Scorsese, Spielberg, Tarantino! Its going to be epic!

Well I need to get my beauty rest. We are off to Cannes tomorrow to get out press badges and I think a bunch of us are going to do the Cannes thing for the evening and hopefully score an invite to a party on Scorsese's yacht!

My life is so not real right now!

Overstreet in Cannes

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